29 on the 29th. I always love birthdays, but I've been especially excited about this one because it's the Golden Birthday, and I only get one of those! And if the day is a foreshadowing of the year, I'm really looking forward to this, my Golden Year.
To be honest, I was a little nervous about this birthday even though I was excited too. Last year I had my HouseBirthWarmingDay party, with more than 75 people coming through my new house, wishing me well and celebrating my 28th birthday with me. This year, I'm in a new city where I only know a handful of people. Is this going to be the loneliest day ever? Gretchen had planned a small party for me in the evening, but the rest of my day was wide open. She was in a wedding in Indiana this weekend, so she wasn't going to get home until the late afternoon (yes, she really did throw me a party a whopping thirty minutes after walking in the door after a crazy wedding weekend. True friendship? I think so too). I'd planned to hang out with Steve and Ellen in the morning, but then it turned out this was his only day to move into his new apartment. One of my friends was going to come up from Philly last night and spend all of today with me, but she had a family emergency and wasn't able to come.
Okay, God. I'm beginning to understand that this day is going to be more about you and me. Help me to rework my expectations and to embrace whatever else you have planned for my day.
So I got up and went to the 9am service at Brooklyn Tabernacle. At the risk of sounding cheesy, the whole service felt like a birthday present from God. As we sang about God's love, how deep and high and wide it is, I was just overwhelmed to think how much God loves me. And that he loves me better than I can love myself-- another reminder to trust his plan for my life instead of my own. I'll have to write a whole different entry about what I learned from the sermon, but suffice it to say, it was exactly what I needed to hear as he challenged us to live in the light of eternity and not to be distracted by what Satan wants us to think is important. We finished out with the song about God being mighty to save-- another needed reminder that Jesus has conquered the grave and nothing is impossible for him.
I'd gotten a "free birthday drink" coupon in the mail from Starbucks, so after church I cashed it in and took my iced soy chai latte (my favorite drink that I only get on very special occasions) to a park a couple blocks from my house. One of my best friends had given me a card and gift that said "Do not open until your birthday"-- and on the other side it said "Sorry.... not til Sunday" (she knows me too well!). So I took it with me to the park and sat on a bench in the sun and opened the gift and read the card, then took out my journal and wrote a bit.
After a little while, I headed back home and did some leisurely prep for the party. I was a little nervous about the guest list-- several different groups of people who didn't know each other. Is this going to be disastrous? But it wasn't; not at all. I sat there with friends who have known me my whole life (okay, just one has known me my whole life, and that's my older brother; but Steve and Josh have known me for pretty long too) and friends who I just met when I started working at Alice's in June. I had close friends from Philly and new friends who are getting to be close friends here in New York. And I just felt blessed.
I really was nervous it was going to be a lonely day. But it wasn't at all-- far from it, in fact. Even in my "alone hours," I had constant reminders from God and from others (texts and emails and phone calls-- oh, and who can forget the Facebook wall posts?!) that many people are walking alongside me and loving me, even from afar.
I want to write something about how much I appreciate all of my friends and my family, but everything I start to type sounds cheesy. Yep, I just tried to expound on that, and it sounded cheesy too. So please accept it at face value-- friends and family, I love you, appreciate you, and am thankful to God for putting you in my life.
So like I said, with all of you beside me, I'm pretty excited about this next year!
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