It's a good thing

Saturday morning I got on a train to Milford, Connecticut to spend the day with my best friend from college and her family. I was Maid of Honor in her wedding, but we've only seen each other twice since then-- and Trevor and Betsie just celebrated their fourth anniversary. Needless to say, we were long overdue for a catchup!

When the train pulled into the Milford station, all I could see from the window was a pair of feet on the platform. I knew right away they belonged to Betsie. I ran off the train and gave her a huge hug, and right away it felt like we'd just seen each other. You know how some friends you can not see forever but then pick up right where you left off? That's how it is with us, and this time was no exception.

On our way home from the train station, we stopped at the local deli to get stuff for lunch. Bets stayed in the car with Lily and Lucy while Trevor and I ran in. While we were waiting in line at the deli counter, Trevor said to me, "Thank you so much for making the trip up...." Are you kidding?? I'm just glad you guys were willing to let me invade your family vacation! "....Sarah [yes, her real name is Sarah and I've called her Betsie ever since our freshman year of college] has really missed you. I'm excited for the two of you to catch up and just to hear you giggle with each other again."

It's always somewhat bittersweet when my friends get married. Obviously it's exciting, but there's also always that selfish part of me that gets sad at the way our friendship is about to change. One thing that's been huge for me lately, though, is to see friends a few years into their marriages. I think one of my favorite things is seeing the way they have learned to look out for each other, to support each other in the little details of daily life, and to see the way they still look at each other with love that has been enriched by both blessings and trials. When Trevor told me he was looking forward to hearing us giggle (and boy! did we make sure he wasn't disappointed!), it made me happy because I knew the motivation behind the comment was not (just) his love for our laughter but really his love for his wife. So yes, the friendship changes. But maybe it's not all bad, after all.

I recently read Proverbs 31 (I'll blog more about that soon), and was struck by the verse "he who finds a wife finds a good thing." I thought of that verse a lot on Saturday as I watched Trevor and Betsie interact with each other and could see the way that he has been good for her and she for him-- and just the way they are so well-suited for each other. It was fun to revisit the scene four years later and see how true it is that Trevor has found a good thing.

Of course there's still that selfish part of me that's a little sad that my best friend has a new best friend; but it's kind of hard to complain when you see your best friend with two adorable girls on her lap and her husband smiling at her with even more love in his eyes than you saw four years earlier on their wedding day. This weekend was a good reminder that friendships change but they don't end. And of course it helps to know that Betsie's new best friend loves when her old best friend shows up for a weekend to catch up on life, to rehash memories, and-- of course-- to giggle.