Someone's Nicest Someone

You know when you see someone scowling and you think they're upset? Or better yet, what about those times when you are the one scowling and someone else sees you and thinks you're upset. And you're not actually upset, but you're just not thinking about not scowling. So there those people go, making assumptions about you-- maybe that you had a bad day, maybe that you're a frowning, grumpy person. And really, all that's going on is that you're just not thinking that you should be thinking about not frowning.

That's what we were talking about last week when we went out with some of our (new!) church friends.... Those awkward moments when you're lost in your own world and someone you know walks past you and you don't realize that they said hello until you're a couple blocks away and have a vague recollection that you may have just heard your name said several times. Be honest; you know exactly what I'm talking about. We talked about how we hope that people know to give us the benefit of the doubt that we weren't purposefully blowing them off or being rude... that sometimes you just frown and you don't mean anything by it. I wonder how often we fail to give others that same benefit of the doubt....

"You know what's life-changing?" Eli said. "Try looking around the subway at all the people there. So many of them are frowning or look really unpleasant or miserable. And you might be tempted to think that you would never want to know them or have a conversation with them. But try this: look at those people and imagine each one as Someone's 'Nicest Someone'-- you know, when someone says 'He's the nicest person I know...'-- and imagine that the person sitting across from you on the subway is that Nicest Someone to somebody else. Try it. It's pretty cool."

I tried it last night on the subway. That grumpy old man didn't seem so grumpy anymore; he seemed like maybe he'd just had a rough day. And the sullen teenager seemed a whole lot more misunderstood than rebellious.

Eli was right; it's pretty cool.

You should try it sometime.