It's Just a Bank Account...

I'd like to open a checking account, please.
Yes, I live here in Brooklyn.
No, sorry, I won't be able to maintain a $2500 minimum balance each month.
No, I haven't gotten any mail at my new address yet.
No, I won't be getting utilities in my name.
Yes, I know you have a branch in Philadelphia.
No, I don't want to go back to Philly to open my account so I can use this branch in Brooklyn.

There's this street a little less than a mile from my apartment that is lined with banks on both sides. Good thing! I started at one end and worked my way down until I found a bank that would give me free checking without having to ask my roommates to put one of the utilities in my name so I could prove that I live here. They used the Philly address on my driver's license as my permanent address and put my Brooklyn one as my mailing address. I figured that it wasn't worth it at that point to explain that I'd never actually changed my Philly address when I bought my house last summer, so even the one on there wasn't actually right.....

One of these days I fully intend to consolidate all of my identities and have just one address....

Let the Job Hunt Begin!!!

I started job hunting today. BLECH.

I'm not picky; I don't ask for much. I just want a job that--

- pays well
- has a flexible schedule so I can hang out with my brothers on the weekend, Gretchen on the weekdays she has off, and any friends who come to visit me
- ooh.... health benefits; it'd be nice not to have to pay for those
- isn't too fast-paced, but isn't boring either
- pays well
- is within walking distance so I don't have to buy a MetroCard
- doesn't have me working crazy hours-- not too early, not too late

Hmm.... wonder why I didn't find anything today. :-/ Maybe tomorrow will go better.....

Steadfast Love

"Blessed be God, because he has not rejected my prayer or removed his steadfast love from me" (Psalm 66:20).

He has not removed his steadfast love from me-- not even to replace it with a different kind of love. He is constant; it's always the same love even when it looks different.... all the hard stuff is a manifestation of-- not a challenge to-- his steadfast love.

If I could put tears in a bottle....

I went to Brooklyn Tabernacle this morning. It was a little different than I'm used to...

For one thing, people were clapping all throughout the service. Not because they were being irreverent or because they were confused-- but because they were filled with joy.

For another thing-- and probably what struck me the most-- I had no responsibilities, and no one asked me any questions. The only woman who stopped me on the way out just wanted to tell me "God bless you."

It was just what I needed. I got to hear about Jesus and not worry about a typo in the bulletin, not think about who I needed to grab after the service (or who might grab me), or wonder what was going to happen because of some announcement that had just been made that would affect my workload for the upcoming week.

I heard about the prostitute who washed Jesus' feet with her tears. The pastor said something I'd never heard before-- that it wasn't just that she was crying; that wouldn't have been enough tears to wash his feet. But back then they had "tear bottles"-- when women cried, they would capture their tears in a bottle and cork it. They were usually buried with these tear bottles. This prostitute had doubtless been hurt many times. And she brought all that hurt and all that misery and poured it on Jesus' feet, the feet that would soon be pierced for her. For me. God has been reminding me how he is with me in it all, feeling all the pain and confusion and fear-- and he cares deeply for each of those tears.

Ikea Adventures

I woke up before 6am this morning because my window faces east and I don't have curtains. Kinda cool to wake up naturally-- if only it could happen two or three hours later...

We (Tim, Steve, Mary, Melissa, and I) went to Six Flags today (and yes, I chickened out of both Kingda Ka and Nitro...). On our way home, Tim said, "So what are you gonna do about curtains?" Well... funny he should ask; I was trying to figure out how I could talk him into stopping at Ikea.

"...and while we're there I could also just quick grab a dresser, because mine wouldn't fit in the car when Gretchen and I tried to take the one from my house..."

Somehow, I have the world's nicest brothers. He was totally up for it. I said, "Don't worry-- I know how to get to Brooklyn-- it's Exit 14 off the Turnpike. I think Ikea is Exit 13A." Well, I was right about Ikea, at least....

The shopping itself was actually great. I found curtains and a dresser I liked-- I wrote down the bin number for the dresser and we headed that way. But first, a stop in the "as is" section just in case. What's this??! There was the same dresser for 15% off because someone had assembled it and returned it! Sweet! And I didn't bring tools with me, so I wouldn't even have to worry about assembling it!

All good in theory.

We got it out to the car, and could not for the life of us get it inside the car. About 45 minutes later, we wedged it in the trunk and managed to tie the trunk down with some twine. So much for a quick trip! We got in the car and I said, "Thank you; I'm sorry; and I'm really glad that I wasn't here by myself trying to figure this out."

Back on the Turnpike, headed for Exit 14.... except that the sign said "Holland Tunnel" and I was sure that yesterday it said "Verrazano Bridge." iPhone to the rescue, sort of. "Um, Tim.... please don't hate me..... we're going the wrong way....." Ah! But we could still go through the Holland Tunnel and just "cut across" Manhattan. Oh right, except that NYC is famous for its traffic....

So the Ikea trip turned into about a 2 1/2 hour addition to our trek home.

Tim never got mad at me.

Have I mentioned I have the world's nicest brothers?!

Welcome.... Home??

That's what Gretchen kept saying as we drove into Brooklyn.... Welcome, yes-- I'd like to feel welcome here. Home? Uh, not so sure....

What a strange mix of emotions.

"Home is where the heart is," Gretchen continued when I balked at her welcome. Well, that makes no sense, because this heart is torn between Philly and New York and probably a little bit in Maryland and a little bit in England.....

Either way, we had a good evening here. Lindsay is here because she had an opera audition today and another tomorrow, so she's spending the night. If you ever really want to mess with the feelings of home, take a roommate from the old residence and stick her in the new one-- confusing! But it was fun to have her here. Dinner with Gretchen, Lindsay, Steve, Ellen, and Ellen's mom; walking around Cobble Hill; hanging out in the new apartment. It's been a full, but good, day.

I guess I've never liked moving, even when it was just a couple blocks away. It's partly my fear of missing out; it's partly the uncertainty of what the future holds. Moving to a different city and having no idea how long it's for-- am I a resident here or just a guest??-- has added a whole new dimension to that struggle.

I guess I'm "home" at least for the summer....

Good night, New York. Thanks for having me.

Closing Time

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end...."

So, it's official. Handed in my keys and cleaned out my office today (ok, that's a lie... I made a neat pile in my office; planning to get the stuff tomorrow). The end of an era. Such mixed emotions, I don't even know how to start thinking about processing it all. I guess that's what New York is for?

"You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here...."

Not sure where I'm going (job-wise), but know I can't stay here. Such a bizarre feeling, being up in the air and knowing that you really can do anything, go anywhere from here.

So tomorrow I'll start packing.

Any minute now it's gonna start sinking in that I'm actually leaving....